


North Pole Follies

by T Verano (t_verano)



Category: The Sentinel (TV)
Genre: 2017 TS Secret Santa Drabble Days prompt "snow somethings", Crack, Gen, snow-sculpture crack, sort of christmassy crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-11
Updated: 2017-12-11
Packaged: 2020-05-15 09:13:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19292713
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/t_verano/pseuds/T%20Verano
Summary: "What in the Fourth of July isthat?"There were (very) strange doings at the North Pole last night.(There is an actual purpose for this fic, not to mention a direct cause. Please read the notes at the beginning, or you'll be even more baffled than Simon. And Henri. And Rhonda. And, of course, Jim...)





	North Pole Follies

**Author's Note:**

> written for the 2017 TS Secret Santa Drabble Days prompt "snow (somethings)"
> 
> Crack courtesy specifically of the [fine print for this TS Secret Santa prompt.](https://ts-secret-santa.livejournal.com/156422.html) Which you should read. Because. (The second drabble in [this TS Secret Santa post from 2010](https://ts-secret-santa.livejournal.com/62587.html) also figures into this tale of crack-spiration.)
> 
> Written not just for the prompt, but for ainm, who has modded the TS Secret Santa comm on LJ for years, giving heart and soul and laughter and so much time! at the busiest season of the year! making all our holidays brighter and more beautiful.

"What in the Fourth of July is _that?_ " Simon's voice boomed out across the snow-covered ground with enough force to shake the icicles hanging from the eaves of the Electronic Toys And Innocuous Fake Projectile Weapons Workshop, despite the fact that they were a good twenty yards away and thicker than the average modern chimney. 

"You got me," H said at the same time Rhonda rolled her eyes and said, "Language, Simon," and Jim said, "Sandburg!" - accusingly - and Blair said, "Um."

Then he said "Well," and tugged at the hem of his green felt jacket and rocked a little on his feet, back and forth, until the bells on the toes of his shoes started to jingle. 

Then he said, "Um," again, at which point Simon and Jim and Rhonda all cleared their throats, and H said, " 'sup, bro?" And Blair said, "Fragr`bogrfarklzo`x()iniurrg."

And Simon said, "#?!" and H said, "Huh?" and Rhonda said, "What they said," and Jim said, " _Sand_ burg!" and Blair said --

"Okay, see, remember last night, that little red light blinking in the sky over the Aluminum Christmas Tree Forest then taking a nose dive and disappearing? And we all figured Rudolph had gotten into the wassail again, nothing to worry about, right? Except it wasn't Rudolph - I got tied up in the shop talking with Megan, and by the time I left it was after midnight, and they were just finishing it up." 

"They," said Simon, and "They?" said Rhonda, and "Who?" said H, and Jim said, "Sand. Burg." And snarled. 

"It's not authentic, of course," Blair said. "Traditionally, they would use ice cream - okay, frozen yogurt in a pinch - instead of snow, and carbonized vibranium, and some kind of algae they have that reflects light in the rainbow spectrum, and pantyhose. But the big oval on the left side symbolizes universal seasonal spirit and the icicle sticking out of the right side symbolizes tranquil relations with us, along with a blessing for successful stocking stuffer production - they're really big on stocking stuffers themselves, apparently - and the fractal structures on the top --"

"Sandburg!" said Simon, and "SANDBURG!" said Jim, and "Dude," said H, and Rhonda said, "Blair, who are 'they'?" and "What did you call it, again?"

"It's a Fragr`bogrfarklzo`x()iniurrg," Blair said, and they all stopped talking for a minute and stared at the Fragr`bogrfarklzo`x()iniurrg.

And then Blair scrabbled around in his pocket and pulled out a Polaroid and said, "They were totally cool with me taking their picture - see where they signed their names?" and passed it around. 

And Jim said, "Aliens?!" and H said, "Badgers, babe?!" and Rhonda said, "Elves?! Look at the bells on their shoes!" and Simon said, "Alien elf badgers?! What the hell?!" 

And Simon and Rhonda and H turned around and went back inside to raid Rudolph's wassail stash, and Blair bounced on his toes until his bells jingled again, and Jim said, "Only you, Chief," and rubbed the bridge of his nose and sighed. Loudly.

**Author's Note:**

> Here's the inspirational prompt from ainm, in case you missed the link and are completely and justifiably mystified by this entire ficlet:
> 
>  
> 
> _**Snow ball/man/fort/creature –** something made out of snow by people (well, I guess if you could come up with a way to make it made by badgers or aliens or elves, that would be cool too... ;-) _
> 
>  
> 
> So, you know, I _had_ to. I had no choice, you can see that. Surely. :-))


End file.
